The Social Circle

I wonder if its just me, or do all people go through this phase in their life, sometime or another?- It is difficult to meet new friends, and it is becoming more trying to maintain the existing friendships.

Currently, the only people whom I regard as close friends can be counted in a snap. There's the best friend, the ho peng you, the officer, the cousin, and the one who stays a few blocks away. You guys know who you are.

Then, I am thankful for the ex-colleagues who will warm my heart with their regards through SMS-es now and then. I guess I should call them friends instead of ex-colleagues. Hanged out with Diana a while ago, met up with Marge last week, was on the phone with Cecilia today and I'm genuinely happy to know that they are doing well.

Then there is the favourite boy, who is 'multi-functional'. As I was saying to Marge the other day, I owe a lot of my current state of happiness to him. He is the boyfriend, the buddy, the best friend, the classmate, the confidante, the soul mate, and the supportive family member all rolled into one person. Despite our differences in all ways possible, I love him enough to know that he is the one whom I want to grow old with, until the day when I die from being agitated by my students.

Prior to this relationship, I have always reminded myself that I am never going to rely too much on the next boyfriend, and that a level of pessimism must be maintained at all times to prepare myself for the impact should the relationship fail again. People who know will know that I will probably die if I have to live through the trauma of a bad breakup once more.

Looking at myself and the favourite boy now, pessimism has been replaced by a hearty dose of optimism and plans for the future have already been made.

Heart 1, Head 0.

Of course, there have been discouraging remarks from friends who know about our future plans. "Too young, too soon." Admittedly, I have been shaken by the remarks but I have come to realise that as long as both of us and our families are cool with the idea, no one else matters. This realization hit me as Marge told me the other day that I am just being practical to plan ahead of time, and this is how I do things in all the years that she has known me. I'm glad for listeners who understand that I know what I am doing.

I'll have to accept fate if I do not have the chance to meet new, genuine people whom I can click with, but I am determined to treasure all the friends that I have right now.