heartbreak

its over.. we broke up after 15mths and 24days together.. its not an ending that i wanted.. but theres nothing i can do to salvage anything.. things are already bad enough without me trying to salvage it..
i know people are going to shake their heads and condemn me as a hopeless case but i really wished everything was a bad dream and we are still together.. but i cant seem to wake up from this bad dream..
only a few friends know that we have broken up.. im sure the news will spread soon.. dont know where to hide myself when people ask me what went wrong.. dont feel like answering the question as i dunno the answer..
right now i just feel like part of my heart was dug out of me overnight.. one of the pillars supporting me in my life has fallen.. i cant build it back.. i cant have my heart back.. cause ive got no strength to salvage anything anymore..
i still love him a lot.. i really do.. my tears have run dry.. so im constantly crying.. minus the tears.. im so useless.. its smthing i love dearly.. yet i can do absolutely nothing to stop it from leaving me..
to my friends.. dont worry about me.. ill prolly recover given a few years time.. meanwhile.. if u see a me that looks unhappy all the time.. dont ask me why.. please stop asking me why..